Sunday, February 05, 2006

I saw him then, sitting as still as stone before me, his small, concise features usually so impassive, contorted now into an expression of mocking disdain. He's laughing at me, I know it. He loves nothing more than to mock those he flees. Always one step ahead. So motionless, yet still so far out of reach. But he cannot be caught. After all, the entire world is searching for him fervently without success. Why should I and how could I be the one to claim him? Bu I did have him once. I am not quite sure how I let him escape. For certain I had not the faintest idea of his value. Not that it matters now.
I make a grab for him, his unbridled arrogance in the face of my distress becoming too much to withstand. But he is too quick, he is always too quick. My frustration only seems to fuel his evasions. Heinous, flighty creature! He cares not who he blesses with his presence, from the purest saint to the vilest wretch he will grace them for a time until the fickleness of his spirit bids him leave. He will obey it every time, no matter how you think he loves you, no matter how you believe that he will never desert you. He will obey it every time and he will take from you more than he ever gives. Will leave you desolate and wanting. Such a small, simple thing he seems, yet so huge, so complex.
So cherish him while he lingers, he may not favour you much longer. Be sure to tell those that tempt him to rest with you a little longer just how much they mean to you. I was foolish. I pushed them aside in a selfish attempt to be closer to him. Now he loves me no more. He only laughs. I hate the damnable creature for leaving me with no explanation, yet I adore him as I look upon him. Scornful as it is, his countenance glows with a bliss that I long to know again. But he is uncatchable and I have nothing to lure him back with. I have shunned the very ones that would help me reclaim him in my own desperate hunt. He will revel in the irony, I know.
I make another grab for him. He dodges again.
Its funny how far people will go to attempt to catch the uncatchable. Silly really. Futile certainly. He cannot be bribed, nor blackmailed. He will ignore pleas and your threats will fall upon deaf ears. His one secret weakness, I have belatedly discovered, lies not in the foolhardy chase, but in method and patience. His fondness is not for gold or silver, nor for fear or power but for his bosom companion, selfless Love. If first you find Love, he will come to you of his own accord and bless you many times over, bringing your World to light and your dreams to life. Its as ridiculously simple as it is tragically difficult.
P.S.: Lest you think this is Hitesh 'uncloseting' himself, the 'he' here is Happiness!!! No guy would mind being 'gay' and happy, would he ;)